4.26.09 - 238/365

a bit of a cop out of a self portrait
i don't see a truth here
i don't feel a connection to me
unless it's that i was trying too hard
to make up for something i missed...

at about 5
i went out into the garden to read.
it had been so hot
that it was the first time all day
that it was comfortable to sit in the sun

i was on the chairs from my mom
very cozy, with cushions
and oski came up
and was lying next to me
i would have given anything
to have had my cellphone
to take a self portrait at that moment
to capture the perfection of it

but maybe it is better
for that image to exist
just in my mind,
just in my heart,
and for me to have had the experience
as opposed to the reflective
(and revlexive) reaction.