12.31.08 - 122/365

listen to your heart

joy, light, love & hope
2 all
in 2009

happy new year

my new year officially starts 1/15
stay tuned

12.30.08 - 121/365

after 4 days
i finally got parallels updated from 3 to 4
and it actually seems to have been worth it
it's a pretty seamless solution for the mac/windows environment

so this feels a bit like i.t.-me;
i actually used to do a lot of on site support
and often would be helping someone
they'd get a call
and i'd hear them say
"i've got to go, the computer person's here"
and i'd look aroud
thinking that i should meet them
except
they were talking about me...

another self portrait:

12.28.08 - 120/365

my new top
the more i look at it
the more it resembles pjs
i wore it today as daywear
i'm sure i'll do that again
:D

the end of the season

12.28.08 - 119/365

in central park today with bruce & laura
and...
my dad

(those are his eyes)


another type of self portrait,
my faithful steed,
as seen from the 2nd floor of the whitney

12.27.08 - 118/365

for my partner in crime

got lost in so many places today...
this was only one of them:

some background
i subscribe to the Robert Genn Twice-Weekly Letter.
i don't always agree with everything; it is mainly geared towards representational painters
but i often learn something and i recommend it to anyone in the visual arts.

yesterday i received the following letter:

December 26, 2008


Dear Nina,

For the past while, our good friends Gil and Marion Dyck have needed a medium sized abstract to go at the top of the stairs in the entrance to their new home. Over the last two days Gil and I got together and made one. Gil is a medical doctor who works in emergency in the local hospital and had no previous experience in painting. While both he and his wife are well informed about art and are serious collectors, he doubted his potential contribution as a co-painter. But when he got the brush in his hand, he began to see the possibilities. We've illustrated our progress and techniques at the top of the current clickback.

The Dycks had in mind a strong-impact vertical 36" x 48" acrylic. We decided on a 2" stretcher gallery canvas so the work could hang unframed. After a grey primer the early strokes were augmented with a roller. A dark tone was chosen to give spotted and blended effects and a strong vertical presence.

Various brushes and cardboard spreaders were used to add serendipitous colours and shapes. Paint squeezed directly from the tube was scraped and formed to add significant texture. Without too much planning, a motif began to form. Gil and I alternated work on the canvas.

The next day the paint was dry enough to tone down with a glaze. Then we scumbled here and there to add casualness and mystery. We worked more patches of colour back into the motif. Decisions were made to cover the less desirable passages and to leave those of greater interest exposed. While individual gestures and motifs were somewhat arbitrary, we found these decisions were often difficult to make. We agreed that toned-down surrounds were needed to play against higher-key centers of interest. We tried to avoid specific detail and went for overall graphic soundness. Including interspersed acrylic isolation coats and slightly forced drying, the second working lasted about an hour.

We discussed several titles. As the work had evolved into a sort of enigmatic monument, we decided to call it "Totemic rise." As the effort was a co-project, we signed it "Gennovese Van Dyck."

The work was shortly on their wall. After a few days we'll put on a coat of final varnish to make sure our efforts stick around.

Best regards,

Robert

if you click the "clickback" link above, you can see the process unfolding and read a bit more about it.

well, this didn't sit right with me AT ALL
and this was my response:

Dear Robert,

I honestly have to say I don't know how to respond to this letter. The subject "Holiday fun" is not lost on me and I am a huge fan of the DIY approach to home decor but I am not sure what is being said here about abstract art. I suppose it is the line between decoration and art that has become blurred and I am not sure which of those things this exercise was meant to address. This is particularly confusing because the Dyck's are described as serious collectors which implies commitment to and respect for the role art plays in our cultural and spiritual development as well as an appreciation of the dedication that is necessary to make meaningful work in any genre.

The description of the process shows that certain basics tenets of painting were observed: a concern for balance and composition, evaluation of color, consideration of texture and a nod to preservation, all which are dutifully recorded. Yet, a crucial element, one especially integral to abstract expressionist art is completely missing: the desire to evoke emotion and/or to create an expression of the human experience. These things reside deeply in the base of most abstract painting and yet the project as you describe it seems to have been conducted without any concern for the very thing that separates abstract work from the notion that "my child could have done that".

In faithful representational painting, skill of draftsmanship, mastery of technique, control of light can all be easily evaluated and a skilled painter can often compensate for a lack of emotional content if their technique is sufficiently refined. Expressionistic work involves a leap of faith and a willingness to balance a seeming lack of representational qualities with the benefits of an emotive response, but abstract work is at the other end of the spectrum and its power lies in its ability to seduce the viewer into abandoning concepts of the world as it is perceived it to be in order to venture into a deep, rich, collective unconscious of emotions, fears, dreams and visions. I find it unfortunate that what a "well informed" collector "need"s in a medium sized abstract is a work that seems more about functioning as a pleasing surface than the experience of having access to a doorway that opens into the mysteries of life.

In all fairness, you have refrained from defining what was made (art/decoration/whatever) and I can imagine that the thrill and joy of creating this piece will bring much happiness and light into the Dyck's home. But, while I am sure Gil "can do this" I hope there is some understanding that it might take as much time and effort to achieve genuine proficiency as it would for me to become a medical doctor in the ER.

All the best for a wonderful 2009,

Nina Meledandri
www.meledandri.com

you can see other people's responses and comments on my response here

12.26.08 - 117/365

often
it's just about
color

12.25.08 - 116/365

so
i guess all my loved ones know i love
green
and
pink
and
cats

(also for fgr & december 25)

i rarely take verticals
(but there was no other way)
&
i rarely have a tree
(i am usually in la for xmas)
so
i really wanted to document it
(and still i missed the angel's head)

12.24.08 - 115/365

all wrapped up and ready to go
:)
love, light & joy to all

(& surprisngly an entry for fgr and the arm's length self portrait experience)

trees waiting for a last minute home

12.23.08 - 114/365

i don't wear tutlenecks that often

even though i cut way back on the xmas shopping this year
i still bought myself a little present
:)

truth be told
i like the triptych of today's images the best

12.22.08 - 113/365

getting to that point in the project
where i am starting to question it

why this?

why not this?

or this?

or this?

or even this?

it requires answering the question why
(as in why am i doing this?)
and what?
(as in what does it mean?)
and if "art" is about some sort of "truth"
then
which truth?

it's a place you have to go
if you are going to discover anything
but i know from experience
that it can be an uncomfortable place
a place of questions
with no immediate answers
it's the dark underbelly of process
and it's particularly awkward when it occurs publicly...

12.21.08 - 112/365

happy solstice

i was going to do the fgr camouflage challenge
but there was just something that felt right about the image above

and anyway
it wasn't my intent when i took the one below
i was more in the
"clearing out this studio is going to be the death of me" frame of mind

and this floor...
it's really hard

12.20.08 - 111/365

i wanted a picture with my tree
but i didn't feel like setting it up...
(more of the tree)

and i wanted a picture for macroday

it's hard to tell who i am today

12.19.08 - 110/365

oh so silly

but who can resist the first snow

(i was trying to get an action shot)

and i was sent the elf dance from a long lost flog friend
i thought it was soooooo cute
that i made my own
enjoy
:D

12.18.08 - 109/365

had dinner with my nephew tonite
b4 he went back to la for the holidays
i meant to take my sp w/him
but when i took out my camera...
no memory card
and my cell phone was basically dead
:(
since he has the same middle name as my dad
(though it was the name everyone new my father by)
and since he identifies with it
here's my little piece of nick for tonite

12.17.08 - 108/365

for fgr & dr_nik Rocks My Socks !!

so
it seems as if the etch-a-sketch image was a pretty popular choice
not being the photoshop queen,
i was originally going to go with her i've been scanned post
but she inspired me to seek higher heights...
also a nod to bitch,
which inspired this bitch
:D

unfortunately,
if i'm not painting
i don't feel as if i am getting anything done

12.16.08 - 107/365

for fgr & self portrait in christmas balls

this was harder than i thought because
(and sorry, there's no way to write this without saying "balls" in some pretty strange contexts for a girl)
while i have a ton of ornaments
i don't have a lot of balls
and it seems that i mostly have old balls
and they don't reflect that much anymore
and i seem to specialize in blue balls
which
even though it will be the theme of my tree
"blue" was just a little to literal for today
which left me with this
one of my largest balls
but barely reflective...


not as nice a day as yesterday

12.15.08 - 106/365

it was a beautiful day to be outside today

even though
i felt like hiding
too

i also feel i need to start
but i can't risk stopping again
i am going to wait for that clear space
as wrong as that feels in a way

12.14.08 - 105/365

uncharacteristically at a loss for words

that's why we have pictures . . .

12.13.08 - 104/365

the best thing about about having everything in storage for 2+ years
is that it's all new again
and i don't have to go shopping for dress up clothes
but going through all this stuff makes me realize how much my life has changed
how i've let go of a lot of this,
for example,
i am 3 months into this project
and yesterday/today is the first time i've worn make up...
this wouldn't have happened 10 years ago,
maybe not even 5.

today's parties

left: volunteering at the 77th precinct council christmas party for kids in need in our community: the adults play musical chairs
right: lizzie's holiday party: the kids are taking over

12.12.08 - 103/365

it's holiday party time . . .
tonite was the dreaded christmas work party,
it was early in the evening
and since i couldn't quite see getting this dressed
at 8 in the morning, to go to work
i decided that i would ride back to brooklyn around 8 pm
get dressed again
and go back into town for the next celebration
thankfully the bad weather broke

and i could ride my bike

after 4 glasses of wine,
and not too much food
i never would have had the energy to go out again
without that 45 minutes of exercise

12.11.08 - 102/365

nothing looked right today
especially not me
and not this sweatshirt either

it doesn't matter whether it's clothing or paint
(or anything else for that matter)
it's my all time favorite color

at one time
brera cinnabar oil was this color
but they changed the formula
and i am forever trying to mix it
williamsburg paint once made a special edition color
that was a version of this,
for someone who decided they didn't want it
so i bought all that was left

anyway,
this is a close approximation

12.10.08 - 101/365

i made one of my favorite meals tonite
for the first time in easily 3 years
pumpkin ravioli with an eggplant/tomato sauce
(plus a bit of ricotta & parmesan)
sounds odd
but it works
yum

not exactly sure why i am posting this
not exactly sure
period

12.9.08 - 100/365

omg it's my 100th day...
and it's a night at the opera
for fgr's invasion of the groucho marx appreciation society

i am surprised i like doing this
it's not really my personal concept of "self portrait"
but it's been a good diversion
when i am totally bored with myself

i like the out takes too
:D

a little too much drama, not enough camp

i liked the color too much to sepia tone it

actually the test shot, just to find my position; too not in character